This Week in Politics
Monday, March 25 In an effort to resurrect his father, George W. Bush sacrifices Jeb Bush on an altar at the family’s ranch in Texas. President Trump skips out on meeting with North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un to watch…
Category: News
Timely Mason PD Finally Email Students About 1993 Sexual Assault
Students complain Mason “too transparent” BY ABIGAIL ADCOX THE ASSISTANT On Tuesday, March 26, students received an email from Mason PD alerting them to a suspect allegedly groping female students, which occurred in several residence halls on campus in 1993….
Mason To Replace Cut-Down Jc Trees With Statues Of Charles Koch
Mason to erect statues of Charles Koch in place of all trees on campus BY DANA NICKEL, CHIEF EGG Shortly after returning from spring break, Mason students were outraged to notice the trees surrounding one entrance to the Johnson Center…
Mason Students to Live in Classrooms Due to Lack of Available Housing
Classrooms able to accommodate up to 958 students BY BASMA HUMADI, LEO SUN LIBRA MOON It is no secret student housing is in high demand as the population of incoming Mason students continues to grow. Just last year, seniors at…
Mason Student Gets Drunk, Actually Beats Robot
“It just wanted to have a beep-boop day” BY IZZ LAMAGDELEINE COPY GOD In a manner that showed how professional, incredible and amazing Mason students are, Tuesday, March 28, a student was found in a state of intoxication close to…
Charles Koch Found Scavenging in Air Ducts of School He Purchased
Aging billionaire seen searching for food scraps, small trinkets BY MR. SHEDD FROM JMU ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR Billionaire oil mogul and patron of Mason Charles Koch, 83, was reportedly seen Friday, March 29, in the air ducts of the Johnson…
All Outlets Removed; Cabrera “Fend For Yourselves, Bastards”
BY JACK HARVEY STAFF WRITER On the morning of March 25, 2019, students entered classrooms across Mason to discover that all charging outlets had been removed from buildings, having been either plastered over or torn out over the weekend. The…
Mercatus center Plagiarized Dead Kennedys’ “Kill the Poor”
Tyler Cowen of Mercatus defends integrity, proposes collab BY JAY JUGHEAD JAMISON The Mercatus Center has been embroiled in a legal battle against the remaining members of the Dead Kennedys, whose lawyers claim a paper recently published by Mercatus in…
Mason Weekly Crime Log
Monday, March 18- Fairfax Campus, Multiple times Stalking: Complainant (GMU) reported receiving unwanted contact from an unknown subject (GMU) on multiple occasions. Due to confidentiality of reporting, limited information is available regarding this incident. CSA Report #031819- Information Only. Tuesday,…
Faculty Senate Begins Voting on Gift Acceptance Policy Amendments
Amendments to the draft remain incomplete, will be voted on further BY JACK HARVEY, STAFF WRITER Mason’s faculty senate began voting on proposed amendments to the current draft of Policy 1123 Wednesday, March 13. The policy, defining the terms of…