By Alexander Kenny, Contributor The semester is nearly over and your secret crush from Composition 302 is going to slip away forever. She probably won’t be the mother of your children and the person with whom you share rocking chairs…
By Alexander Kenny, Columnist The Mason pond seems like a serene lunch spot. The ducks are polite, they quack sparingly, and they usually defer right of way when we cross paths. They are grateful when I skip wheat slices towards…
By Alexander Kenny, Columnist Spring in Fairfax welcomed us with 6” of snow. We shoveled, we received an irritating email about “make up days,” but this was a breeze compared to the nor’easter that knocked us back to the Renaissance…
By Alexander Kenny, Columnist Beer pong (BP) is either the party’s thrilling main event or an uncreative party killer. At the mention of BP, Mason students react –let’s say all polled are 21 or older– with dreamy nostalgia for last…
By Alexander Kenny, Columnist Feb. 16 to Mar. 18 is Girl Scout Cookie (GSC) season, followed by Tagalong withdrawal, self-disgust and cookie gut. It’s that magical time of forgivable binges and furious arguments over which cookie is best. Roommates will…
By Alexander Kenny, Columnist On Valentine’s Day, campus couples exhibit more PDA than usual. That night, they’ll spend way too much on surf & turf, then exchange flowers, chocolate and fluids. They will smooch during a 90s movie starring Tom…
By Alexander Kenny, columnist Every four years, Americans tune to NBC to watch beautiful figure skaters, high-tech sled races, Shaun White, and dangerously fast downhill skiing, yet nobody knows what a triple Salchow actually is. We like the drama. We…
By: Alexander Kenny, Columnist For many, choosing who to cheer for this Super Bowl Sunday feels like the 2016 election. The New England Patriots and the Philadelphia Eagles are the most hated football teams in history (except for Michael Vick’s…
By Alexander Kenny, Staff Writer Tattooed men are the new “sensitive.” Tattooed women are the new “approachable.” According to Pew Research Center, 40 percent of millennials (ages 18-35) have at least one tattoo and most have degrees. I’ve met librarians…